15 Things I Almost Said To You But Never Quite Did

Chapter 1

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One;
You always said your mother would have hated me,
Because she didn't like anyone different, and I had the eyes of a painter
And the soul of a philosopher.
And yeah, she probably would have,
But then we'd have had a mutual hatred,
And I think I would have liked your mum in the endup.

Two;
It's been over a month, and I'm sorry to say it,
But even though you claim to be right beside me,
I still miss you like a fúcking limb.

Three;
I didn't realise just how much my bones could ache
Until I met you.

Four;
A week before we broke up
(The first time),
I had bought a book filled to the brim with the philosophies of Aristoclea.
I never told you because I could invision you telling me to read something more interesting,
And I felt my insides splinter.

Five;
You've always loved poetry, but claimed it to be lies dressed up to sound pretty.
When I look at you nowadays,
I feel the urge to ask you if sadness sounds pretty to you, too.

Six;
It's only just gone one a.m.,
But already everything tastes like you.

Seven;
Sometimes I catch you staring at me from a distance.
When I smile, you don't smile back, and
That kills me.

Eight;
There is a girl who sits beside me in art class.
She smells the same way you do,
And it is torture.

Nine;
It's completely illogical, as you haven't gone anywhere,
But I miss you.

Ten;
I have never had so many bad nights.

Eleven;
Sometimes I write poetry about you on the internet.
Strangers who have never met either of us tell me that I deserve better.
You never once realised who I was writing about,
And I am not inclined to tell you.

Twelve;
They think it is beautiful, how I am broken.
I don't think they understand.

Thirteen;
You tell me that I am beautiful.
I tried to say it in the mirror this morning,
But it sounded wrong without your mouth wrapped around the syllables.

Fourteen;
Nothing that comes out of my mouth sounds right without your mouth wrapped around it.

Fifteen;
You don't think this is about you,
But it is very much based around your essence.

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