You know you're English when

Chapter 1

Chapter 1

by: Cosmiic
Blame Rachel and Jenni.

....You sneeze and the whole town gets a cold
....You called shoes for PE at school, daps
.... The smell of cow shat makes you feel at home
.... You know Tesco's don't make meat, eggs, milk etc
... When the sun goes down it gets dark
.... Your local newspaper's headline is 'cow falls off bridge'
.... You turned to drink, drugs or heavy metal at an early age
.... You have nothing to do after 5:30pm
.... You know how to walk over a cattle grid
.... You think nothing of grass growing in the middle of the road
.... You know all your neighbours
.... Your neighbours' average age is 76
.... You can't stand the tourists, despite living off their money
.... You thought it was normal for more than 50% of your high street's shops to be operated by charities
....Your escape plans involve Beeline Coaches (this one made me laugh)
....You've been up the Westbury white Horse

Uh yeah kk done
~CaraXxxx

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