Bang Me: The Big Bang Theory(A Fan Fiction)
Forget everything you've learned about the show. I'm entering in a new character. There is no particular place in the series I'd like it to be in, just enjoy it. I don't want any comment about where in the series things happen. To make it clear, I am NOT making everything exact. Thank you.
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Penny gave me the confused look she gives everyone when sheâ€™s asked a question then only replied with another of her own. â€œDo what?â€
â€œHer stupidity frustrated me, â€œIt. How do you handle living so close to that loony bin of men?â€
â€œEh, they grow on you. Besides, only Sheldon and Leonard live there. Raj and Howard just come to visit. Howardâ€™s the only really annoying one anyway.â€ She answered as if she had been asked this many times before, which frankly, I wouldnâ€™t doubt for a second.
My first reflex was to sarcastically reply, â€œGreat, so we only have to live near the craziest man on the planet and the short nerd.â€
â€œHey!â€ She yelled. She seemed overly defensive so for a moment I was a bit scared. â€œLeonard is Â¼ of an inch taller than Howard.â€
â€œFine. Fine, whatever. Letâ€™s drop this subject. Do you have anything to drink?â€
â€œYeah, what do you want?â€
â€œSomething to DRINK.â€
â€œOh. Will this do?â€ She asked pulling a bottle off the top of her fridge.
â€œYes please,â€ I said taking it from her. I then went to head to my room. I was amazed that she didnâ€™t question my actions at all. She must have had a lot of nights like this herself, another thing I wouldnâ€™t doubt.
I sat on my bed and took a deep swig from the bottle. This had been a hectic day. All I wanted now was to find sleep.
That night I had a strange dream. I was on Mars with all the men from next door. In the dream Leonard had become an evil wizard and had started raising snakes on Mrs. Apparently the snakes raised there would grow to be larger and more dangerous. His master plan was that once the snakes were grown to send them down to earth to destroy the planet, claiming it for himself and all the other nerds. Not much else went on in the dream, but the evil Leonard laugh was enough to scare me awake.
When I woke up I wasnâ€™t in my own bed. Also, Sheldon was right next to me. â€˜How much did I drink last night?â€™ I thought to myself. â€œSheldon, wake up.â€ I said shoving him, â€œI had a nightmare.â€
â€œWhat happened dear?â€ Dear?
â€œLeonardâ€™s got snakes from Mars and sheâ€™s trying to take over the world.â€
At this he sat up straight and his eyes grew wide. â€œMars snakes?â€
â€œYes, heâ€™s going to do something bad,â€ I almost started crying. I didnâ€™t know if it was because of the nightmare or because I was in bed with Sheldon still.
â€œCome on,â€ he said, getting out of bed and taking my hand and pulling me with him. More fear grew in me when I noticed that all I was wearing was one of his shirts. He led me into Leonardâ€™s room while still holding my hand. When we got there the first thing I noticed was that the room was all charred. Maybe the Mars snakes could breathe fire or something. Sheldon let go of me and grabbed Leonard by the shoulders, led him out to the front door, and threw him out. Sheldon then walked back to me. â€œItâ€™s alright now. The bad manâ€™s gone. The police will find him soon enough dear.â€ He then started to lean in to try and kiss me. Thatâ€™s when I woke up screaming.
I was in my own bed this time snuggling an empty bottle. I had never been so happy to be hungover in my life.