A Suicide Note

NO, this is not anyone's suicide note. This is a STORY written by fredanddracoaremyconsorts and Peacegirl13. Comment and tell us what you think!

Chapter 23


The hospital bed was scratchy and uncomfortable. The walls were a harsh white colour, and the stench of disinfectnant blocked Lexie's nostrils. She tried to sit up, and experienced a piercing pain shooting through her head. She winced, and realised that a constant dull pain consumed her entire body. Lexie looked down at her arm and saw a clear tube running into it, stuck there with medical tape. She stared at it for a moment.
"It's for food," came a cracked voice from nearby. Lexie turned her head quickly and sobbed silently as she felt agony flash through her neck. She stared at Heather silently for a minute, then lifted her other arm. She drew it across her body and grasped the tube tightly. Heather stood up from her chair.
"Lexie... Lexie, don't pull that out..."
Lexie ignored her and started tugging on it. Heather shot forwards and grabbed her arm.
"It's not just for food," she said loudly when Lexie started trying to break away.
"Lexie, listen to me, it'snot just food! It's water, and blood and oxygen and everything else you need to live!" Lexie stopped fighting and stared at her blankly as she sunk back into the chair.
Heather looked down into her lap. "Why?" she croaked quietly.
Lexie decided to ignore the question. "How long was I... Y'know..." She found it hard to speak, and her voice was quiet and coarse.
Heather glanced up at Lexie, and Lexie saw her eyes were dull and lifeless. Her hair was knotted and messy. Dried up mascara streaks marred her skin. Her clothes were rumpled and stained. Her skin was pale and dry.
"Over two weeks," she said in a hoarse whisper. Lexie looked back up at the ceiling.
"Wow," she said softly.
Heather got to her feet and stood beside Lexie, forcing Lexie to look at her.
"Lexie, why? Why did you do it?"
Lexie squeezed her eyes shut, and a tear leaked out.
"Because.... because you hate me. Everyone hates me. And now K-Karen's gone, because- because she h-hated me t-too..." She started choking on her tears.
"Wh-where's my m-mum?" she asked, in between raking sobs. Heather chewed her lip.
"She-she's not here."
"At work," Heather interrupted.
"Was she here at all?"
"Well- she was once. The day that it happened. She's just been calling since."
Lexie nodded bitterly. "That's what I thought."
"She still loves you," Heather said desperately. Lexie laughed harshly.
"Yeah, right. Whatever you think yourself."
"And I- I don't hate you. I haven't left here since then. I've slept right here on this chair. Watching you."
Lexie nodded as best she could. "I believe you," she croaked. "It's just that Eleanor was-"
"Eleanor was in big trouble," Heather interrupted. "There were people saying that she pushed you."
Lexie smiled a little. "I wouldn't mind telling people that..."
"Well, I would. And by the way, it's past your deadline, and you've actually lost weight. So I get to get you help."
"No, it doesn't count."
"Look, the doctors will be getting you help anyway. You're anorexic and suicidal, they're not going to overlook that."
"I'm not anorexic or suicid-"
Heather moved forwards and lifted Lexie's arm. It was covered in scars, fading now, and pale and bony.
"This," she hissed, "is what the doctors found all over your body. So don't you dare tell me you're not suicidal. Or anorexic. You are getting help whether you like it or not."
Lexie stared at her, suddenly frightened. Heather turned on her heel.
"I need to use the toilet," she said abruptly, and left the room. Lexie looked around her. On the table beside her bed was a little box. She reached for it and opened it frantically. Little containers full to the brim with pills. Using one hand, she tugged the top off of one. The pills were bright blue and shiny. Lexie was mesmerised by them. She lifted the container up to her face and opened her mouth. Just as she was about to tip them into her mouth, she heard Heather's scornfull voice coming from the door.
"I'm ashamed," she said scornfully. Lexie glared at her.
"What do you know? You're not me! You don't know what Im going through! It's your fault! You drove her too it! You and your friends! YOU KILLED HER!!!"
Lexie accusatory voice rang throughout the room, and Heather went white as a sheet. She walked towards Lexie slowly, dangerously. Lexie cowered back in the bed, pulling the sheets over her head. Heather kept walking. When she reached Lexie, she pulled the covers away from her head harshly and threw them across the room. Tears were streaming down her face, but her expression was twisted with anger.
"LOOK AT ME!" Heather screamed at Lexie. "LOOK AT ME!!"
Lexie obeyed, suddenly frightened out of her wits. Heather pulled back her sleeve and displayed scars, long and pale. Lexie stared at them, then looked up at Heather's face.
Lexie just blinked. The botttle of pills had fallen, and the bright blue dotted the harsh white cheerfully. Footsteps echoed from the room above.
Heather collapsed back into the chair, exhausted. Lexie watched her cautiously. They both remained motionless for several minutes. It felt like hours. Eventually, Heather got to her feet again. Lexie flinched. Heather sighed. She took Lexie's hand gently.
"Listen," she whispered, softly. "Listen."
Lexie looked up at her, and found her eyes leaking yet again.
"Listen," Heather repeated. "You almost died. You almost killed yourself. So listen. We're going to get through this. We are going to. We will. If you let me help you. Will you?"
Lexie squeezed Heather's hand. "Only if you'll let me help you."
Heather stopped for minute and thought about it. She thought long and hard. Then she nodded.



~Jenny xxxxxx

Skip to Chapter


© 2021 Polarity Technologies

Invite Next Author

Write a short message (optional)

or via Email

Enter Quibblo Username


Report This Content