What does your horoscope say about you? (read intro plz!)

This is mostly a joke, and it can be mean. Trust me. You Will get offended. And plz don't comment something mean. It's just for fun, like tommorow, you can go up to someone and say " hey this is what your horoscope means" and it is funny, trust me. Don't be mad! And I didn't just make this up. It took a lot of reading to get all this info, your welcome :/

Chapter 1


Aries is the ram
March 21 to April 20

You are confident, enthusiastic, and courageous

Other info about you: Aries are selfish, impulsive, and foolhardy. I wouldent be surprised to hear they're jealous of you, and are quite possibly plotting something against you. That would be so like them.

Likes challenges, winning, and people willing to ignore that thing you do that you think nobody knows about. (We know.)

Dislikes losing, waiting around, and being hit in the face with a shovel. It may have not happened to you yet, but trust me: You aren't gonna like it.

Ruling color: Red
Ruling planet: Mars
Ruling Lunch Meat: pepperoni

Aries Happy Bunny Quote: It's all about me. You should know that.

The Aries method
Anybody can use the Aries Method to answer their questions about life, but Aries are Ecspicially good at it.

Close your eyes and ask your question three times as you turn around slowly. Open your eyes and the first thing your gaze falls on will hold the answer to your question.

For example, if you asked, "How can I stop this fight I'm having with my friend?" and the first thing you see is the stove, that might suggest you should bake them some cookies. But it could also mean you should slam the oven door on their neck, I guess. Crazy Spooky Weirdness can be tough to figure out.

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