Allie Finkle's Rules (The New Girl)
From the book The New Girl by Meg Cabot
Allie Finkle's Rules
When you are starting your first day ever at a brand-new school, you have to wear something good, so people will think you're nice.
You need a lot of fiber in your diet to help digest your food.
No child whose last name is Finkle may touch the doorbell or they will not be allowed to watch television for two weeks.
There is nothing wrong with walking to school with your mom and dad on your first day. Except everything.
If you have special skills or talents, such as having double-jointed thumbs, other people will automatically like you right away.
If a bunch of fifth-grade girls thinks your little brother is cute, just go along with it.
When a grown-up - especially a teacher - asks you to do something, it's really rude not to do it.
Things can't get worse.
You aren't supposed to lie to adults - unless lying to them will make them feel better.
Grilled cheese on whole wheat bread is gross.
Little brothers can be such total phonies sometimes.
You can't let a bully know she's bothering you, otherwise the bully wins.
Standing up for yourself when others are being mean to you is important, especially when it's your first day of school.
It's never funny if someone's feelings are being hurt.
You aren't supposed to lie to adults.
When someone decides she's going to beat you up, the best thing to do is hide.
It's never fun when somebody loses and ends up crying.
When the mother of your kitten is at the veterinary hospital in premature labor, and you don't know if you're going to get a cat or not, and a girl in your class says she's going to beat you up, and you know if you mess up, she's going to do it for sure, it's hard to concentrate on spelling.
Friends - and queens - don't let each other get beaten up.
Pretending like you have things under control and actually having things under control are two very different things.
You have to be careful what you tell your mom. At least if she's the kind of mom who is just going to make things worse.
Peaceful, nonviolent conflict resolution is always the answer.
It isn't polite to call adults names.
I am the oldest child and so I am the one in charge.
The less your little brothers know about your business, the better off you are.
Ask old people what to do because they know everything.
Never eat anything with tomatoes in it, or on it.
Never eat anything that once swam in the ocean.
It's not polite to stare.
You have to ignore your siblings on the playground at school unless one of them is bleeding or otherwise in pain.
The polite thing to say when someone gives you a compliment is Thank you.
If someone wants to beat you up, try psyching her out.
It's not polite to tell someone their advice stinks.
If you say it enough times in your head, it will come true (sometimes).
A lady never raises her fist to another.
We all make mistakes, and we all deserve a second chance.
It's rude to say Yeah to adults. You should say Yes or Yes, sir or Yes, ma'am.
It's mean to invite someone over to your house and then insult them.
Cats don't care what color their collar is.